How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Extremely Unsanitary Conditions of Beer Pong

Via the somehow-George-Washington-University-affiliated GW Hatchet, a tongue-in-cheek story (free registration required) about some not too robust-sounding undergraduate research into bacterial contamination and beer pong. A sentence like this one pleasantly hints at an overgrown science fair project feel to the proceedings:

Both [microbiology students] said their starting hypothesis was that they were going to find a lot of bacteria in a typical game.

It's also worth noting that the basis of their experimental data was a three-hour game of beer pong. No mention of the revised hypothesis, but I'll bet it was something like "Dude, I'm so wasted but I totally could have made it with Shauna if I weren't being such a [expletive] idiot and maybe I should call her right now. Oh [other expletive], what happened to the notebook with the data."

This is, as far as I can tell, some of the most probing and hard-hitting journalism coming out of the District of Columbia these days. Anyway, my point is, if you want to avoid rampant bacterial cross-contamination during drinking games I recommend a little game I call "Wing Attack Plan R", which requires drinking only pure grain alcohol and rain water.

Also, to all you up-and-coming publishing industry insiders out there who may click through to it: Don't bother line-editing the story for grammatical correctness. It will just make you sad.