A Comprehensive List of Food Items I Ate at the Durham Fair Today

When temporarily not eating, you can ride a ferris wheel and view the Durham Fair from above

Did a lot better than last year, quantity-wise. Splitting everything down the middle with the girlfriend makes it a lot easier.

● Chopped BBQ pork sandwich with onions and peppers
● Elephant ear (i.e. fried dough) with cinnamon sugar
● Lime rickey
● Fairly large thingy of fresh ribbon-cut potato chips with bacon bits, chives, and cheese
● Crushed-ice cherry limeade
● Lemonade
● Roasted corn

This was over the course of about three and a half hours. We almost bought our lime rickeys from a stand sponsored by the Middletown Republicans. But fortunately Ellen noticed in time, so we went to the other lime rickey stand instead.

I had the experience this year to come hungry. There are still some things I wish we had gotten to eat. The key here is recognizing that you can't imagine individual items you wanted to eat, but rather imagine the sum total of everything you wanted to eat. Then you recognize that, even if you'd managed to waddle back to the parking-lot shuttle after eating that much food, you'd probably never want to eat again. Also, eating more food would have made it inadvisable for Ellen to ride that mechanical bull.

Next time I'm getting a kielbasa sandwich, though. And a turkey leg. Those looked good.

Two other words to the wise: (1) find out the name of the parking lot you are in, so you get on the correct shuttle bus; (2) bring cash, because the ATMs are hard to find and unreliable, and you will have to run around for ten minutes wondering what kind of hell it would be if you were at the Durham Fair but unable to buy food.

Gorgeous day, too, after a rainy weekend and in spite of predictions of more of the same.

Only one cow was painted this way. Why do all the other cows hate America?