Further Drilling Into the Apparently Addictive Junk Food Consumption Habits of Late-1980s Commercial Mascots

I sense that part of Nate's last post was a subtle request to re-air something funny he wrote almost a year ago, so here it is.

Hooray for never discarding old emails. Incidentally, this is the kind of workday back-and-forth that gave us the idea to have a group blog in the first place. Ironically, we only started the blog after we'd quit the respective unhappy jobs that planted that seed.

(Note: outdated sports references left in for sake of laziness.)

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[Jack to Nate, 12/22/05, 1:15 pm]

In further time-wasting news, I learned just now about the most implausible urban legend ever. (This came up somehow at work. I did know about the Pop Rocks rumor before, of course.) Ha ha! Someday you will remember the information, but you will not remember that it is completely false!

Meanwhile, I'm trying to get my mind around Johnny Damon signing with the Yankees. Unclean! You will not be beautiful any more!

Somehow it is easier to accept the Pirates' decision not to re-sign Josh Fogg.

[Nate to Jack, 12/22/05, 3:16 pm]

I hadn't heard about Josh Fogg yet, but I agree he won't really be missed. Too bad he wasn't a power-hitting third baseman. Johnny Damon going to the Yankees, presumably shaving and cutting his hair in the process, is a team-and-personality switch worthy of the WWE.

Nice to know that the Mikey-likes-it kid did, as the site says, "survive unexploded", though I'd never had cause to doubt this before reading about that urban legend. Not only that, but he sounds like a successful and well-adjusted member of society, which is more than a lot of cereal-commercial stars can say after going through trials such as overbearing parental expectations, the aftereffects of the hard-partying cereal commercial lifestyle, or being molested offstage by the Trix rabbit. For instance, I heard that the reason you never see Frankenberry anymore is because back in the 80s he got a bad sugar rush from his own product and jumped off a 30th-floor hotel balcony. He survived somehow but he can't talk anymore because of the brain damage and his legs are paralyzed. I know it's true because the guy I heard it from knows a guy who used to play racquetball with Count Chocula.

You know, I'm just going to stop now, while the part where I was ahead hasn't scrolled off the top of the page yet.

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So who's funnier, Family Guy or Nate? You be the judge. While you're at it, judge why Nate has chosen Thursday as his drinking day instead of part of the weekend, or why he can't seem to stop blogging about Tecmo sports games.